Twelve Career Lessons They Don’t Put in Onboarding
A few hard-earned lessons about people, politics, consistency, and the parts of work we pretend aren’t part of the job. But really are.
Welcome to the Scarlet Ink newsletter. I’m Dave Anderson, an ex-Amazon Tech Director and GM. Each week I write a newsletter article on tech industry careers and tactical leadership advice.
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Hey all! I just got back home from a few days at the Dragonsteel Nexus Convention in Salt Lake City, Brandon Sanderson’s annual gathering of fans, authors, and artists. It was pretty awesome. My mom and I were there as fans of his series. What an experience! And as I’m a late 40s adult living in a different state, it was a treat to spend that time with my mom.
As for this article, with absolutely unplanned randomness, I ended up with three articles in a row that are listicles. I, personally, enjoy reading well-written listicles, so I’m fine with that.
Continuing this completely off topic trend, I spent the prior week in Maui with family and friends. I love snorkeling, so I spent a few hours in the water every day with a GoPro. At some point I might share a video with all of you when I get around to finishing it. Among other things, I saw a shark, eagle ray, eels, dozens of turtles, and the expected fish of many varieties. I enjoyed it.
Getting back on topic, I felt as we got closer to the end of 2025 that it was a good time for reflection.
1. Being the best worker isn’t nearly as important as being liked.
The best engineer isn’t necessarily the first promoted. The best manager (whatever that means) isn’t necessarily given the larger organization when an opportunity comes up. Similarly, the worst employee isn’t always the first fired.
Instead, the person rewarded (or given more responsibility) is frequently the person everyone likes, is qualified for the role, and no one wants to shoot them down. This means they’re competent enough, and people like them.
On the other hand, while yes, the first person fired is frequently not great at their job, they’re also usually less liked than their peers. Sometimes that’s because of a personality issue, but sometimes their lack of competence annoyed their co-workers.
I’ve bent over backwards for an awesome co-worker to try to get them promoted. Not just people who worked for me. I mean that I’ve proactively reached out to other managers and written promotion feedback for people on their team simply because they were excellent work partners. Being liked is highly valuable.
I’ve also seen people go out of their way to shoot down someone else’s promotion because they were horrible to work with. Or they’ve actively reached out to that person’s manager to complain about how difficult it is to work with them.
In general, being skilled at your job is table stakes. That skill qualifies you for raises or promotions or new opportunities.
However, simply being more exceptional than your peers is not what leads to career improvement. Why is that? Because those processes are run by humans. Those humans are motivated and driven by how they emotionally feel about you. It’s just how humans work. I appreciate an excellent engineer. I care about and want to help a co-worker friend.
Your career will be hampered or accelerated by how well you connect with those you work with. And as a side note, I’m an introvert. I’m not talking about being a social butterfly. It’s just about being a good co-worker.
2. A large component of success is consistency.
Over the years I’ve written this newsletter, I’ve repeatedly had people ask for advice on starting their own newsletter. They’ve sent me drafts of their first articles. They’ve posted a few articles, and asked for referrals.
And then 2 or 4 or 9 articles in, they stop.
Why? Because it’s pretty rare that success lands immediately. This is true for most things in life. And it’s hard to continue when you’re not successful immediately.
“Life is a journey, not a destination” - Ralph Waldo Emerson
or the alternative fun version…
“We are not creatures of destinations. It is the journey that shapes us.” - Brandon Sanderson
Beyond the philosophical value, my point is that grinding things out tends to yield rewards. I have repeatedly failed to write a book or learn guitar because I haven’t stuck with it consistently.
On the other hand, I failed the first few times I tried to get a management job. I kept focused on that being my eventual role, and it worked out well. My writing is pretty decent, in large part because I’ve put significant effort into it. For most things, it’s a simple formula of “interest → lots of dedicated time → skill/success.”
I’ve repeatedly seen people do things poorly at work, but I’ve rarely seen them do the same thing poorly for many years.
People usually give up early, or they improve.